TOWIE Series 17, Episode 1: And the award goes to...

Published Monday, Feb 29 2016, 16:04 GMT  |  By  |  Add comment
TOWIE burst back onto our screens on Sunday night for the first episode of series 17, part filmed in Gran Canaria and part back home in Essex. Oh, how we have missed them! As always, there were glorious one liners, rows, flirtations, bikinis and glamour aplenty.

Here is the best of Series 17, Episode 1:

Cutest New Addition To The Cast

Dan treated girlfriend Kate to a beautiful puppy called Ronnie for Christmas… which he ended up looking after while she was in Gran Can. "I bought Kate a dog for Christmas but it sort of backfired on me a little bit," he admitted. "I didn't realise how much hard work it is. It's like being a dad, having a baby."

TOWIE Series 17, Episode 1
Dan with puppy Ronnie


So cute!

Most Unappreciated Gesture

When Liam said he wanted to show the boys a bit of culture and took them on a tandem camel ride. Tommy's response was: "We're in Gran Canaria, not Dubai, mate. This is crazy." Pete, meanwhile, said: "I can safely say that was one of the worst ideas you've ever had mate. Ferne gets helicopters, we get camels."

Best Customer Service

Gemma was telling Billie about rumours Lockie is seeing someone when the phone rang in her shop. Clearly the goss comes first as GC picked up the phone and said: "Gemma Collins Boutique, can you call back in an hour? Bye."

Most Grown Up

Diags has a new job as a plumber. "I'm proud of you," said Arg. "At the end of the day, he's paying the bills, putting food on the table for Fran and working with his old man, which is cute." Diags simply said: "I love plumbing!"

TOWIE Series 17, Episode 1
Gemma in her boutique


Gem chose Billie over the phone.

Funniest Moment

Arg's time on The Jump is still a hot topic. Aside from mocking his lycra suit, Diags had one comment: "You did well to get eliminated twice from the same competition."

Most Awkward Language Barrier

Bobby trying to instigate a chat with the sexy dancer in the hot tub. His lack of Spanish led to gems like, 'You come a lot?' Poor Bobs. We've all been there.

'The Only Way is Essex' cast filming, Gran Canaria, Spain - 18 Feb 2016
Bobby Cole Norris enjoys whipped cream with a dancer

© Rex Features / Simon Ford

Hot tub language barrier.

Biggest Transformation (and head?!)

As Bobby said, Mike Hassini has gone from a caterpillar to butterfly. And doesn't he know it! He told Chloe: "I'm a good looking geezer. I'm confident. I know I'm a good looking geezer. Come on Chloe, you must think I'm a good sort."

Most Oosh Moment

Chloe putting Mike in his place when he kept quizzing her on whether she found him attractive. "You ruin yourself because you're a keyboard warrior, everyone I ever meet says you message them. I've seen you in Faces go from girl to girl to girl."

Most Real Moment

Bobby saying he finds it hard to approach men he fancies: "I'll be really honest with you. Everybody thinks I'm the most confident man ever but I'm not the guy who can go over to someone at a bar and say can I get you a drink? I'm too scared."

TOWIE Series 17, Episode 1
Mike Hassini


Magic Mike.

Best Cameo Comeback

Ferne on FaceTime! She may have left the show but she still wanted to know the goss, phoning Danielle in Gran Canaria to find out how things had been going with Lockie.

Most Clueless Cook

Arg because he had to phone Tommy on holiday in Gran Canaria to ask him how to cook spinach. Oh Arg! Bonus points for his comedy apron.

Most Glamorous

So tough cause they all glam all the time! But we'll give it to Danielle for her cute oversized shirt and bikini combo, and that gorgeous mesh dress she wore to the party in Gran Can.

TOWIE Series 17, Episode 1
Ferne FaceTimes Danielle in Gran Canaria



Most Random Beef

Chloe accusing Pete of cancelling a promise made to her daughter. It was just so out of the blue and random! As was her very angry response: "Who the f**k is Peter Wicks. He is a little scrawny rat with no ass."

Best Brotherly Battle

The Clarks: Who has better hair? Who is better looking? Who has better facial hair? So many questions and we need answers!! Jon and Chris made their debut in the premiere episode.

Best Suitcase

Bobby, no contest! Just look at it!

TOWIE Series 17, Episode 1
Bobby's suitcase


Bobby's suitcase!

Best Quote

Pete on the golfing course in Gran Canaria while talking to Lockie: "You look like you're going to my uncle Ted's 50th birthday party. But to be fair, I was walking through the clubhouse and I don't think they've ever seen a geezer in here with a ponytail and couple of tattoos. They thought I was going to nick something."

Sweetest Moment

Pete comforting Danielle when she received Gemma's text about Lockie seeing someone (which he denied). Pete took her off to a quiet part of the bar away from everyone so she could dry her tears and regain her composure, while giving her words of advice and support. What a gent.

TOWIE continues Wednesday at 10pm on ITVBe

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